The Jazz Butcher
The Jazz Butcher Lyrics Southern Mark Smith


Southern Mark Smith
Thousands of people are queueing in the rain to meet the Pope
(Meet the Pope, meet the Pope, meet the Pope)
I wonder what they're feeling
Well I hope its O.K.

You know some people gonna call anyone a big mouth
(Big mouth, big mouth)
Yeah, well I'll see them in the bar on a Saturday
Right now I get along, get along, get along, get alonga get along
Just like a southern Mark Smith


Whooo, ooo, ooo, ooo - Yeah, like a southern Mark Smith
Whooo, ooo, ooo, ooo - Southern Mark Smith

Thousands of people are queueing for a shuttle into space
(Into space, into space, into space)
Yeah, I'm into space I think its just fantastic
Right now I'm looking around for the right words
For all you special gorgeous things
Oh, don't you know they only make those pop records out of plastic?

Hey, but you know what they tell you on the BBC
You know what they tell you and it's plain to see
You gotta put on you best friend's anorak
And come out here and try it out for yourself

Whooo, ooo, ooo, ooo
You gotta come on out at 1 o'clock and try it out for yourself
Whooo, ooo, ooo, ooo
You gotta walk & talk & think & look & act just like a
Southern Mark Smith


Thousands of people out there just gotta be O.K.
I wish I could take them all down with me to the bar for some laughs
But right now I gotta find out where they could be living
They could be living in sin
They could be carrying shame
Gotta find somebody's gonna carry the blame
Gotta find out what makes your heart sing
Because I found out already what makes my heart sing
Its necessary that I find out what makes your heart sing
'Coz I heard it was like a southern Mark Smith

Found On

Buy These Records
A Scandal In Bohemia
The Albatross. A record, I feel, of its time. We were young(ish) and cocky and I think it shows. I still haven't learned to sing on this one, which bugs me too. Still, it was cheap and cheerful, and it helped us to meet an awful lot of people.
Purchase Now
( )
[A Scandal In Bohemia cover thumbnail]
Glass Records
Southern Mark Smith
Recorded in the summer of 1983 in a place called Wellingborough, a small town in the middle of England where even the children are scarey!
[Southern Mark Smith cover thumbnail]
Glass Records 7"
Real Men
Real Men, the kind who never sit together on buses in case they get their medallions tangled.
[Real Men cover thumbnail]
Glass Records
The Gift Of Music
This record collects together the various singles that have been issued in England to date under the much-abused name of the Jazz Butcher, to wit: me. I rather like having them all in one place like this - it makes for a nice, noisey muck-it-up sort of disc that is ideal for leisure time at home, on the beach, in you local club.... hell, ANYWHERE!!!
[The Gift Of Music cover thumbnail]
Glass Records
Bloody Nonsense
The Jazz Butcher and his group are not in the business of belonging; they are too old and too obstreperous to conform to some attention-seeking image or commercially viable formula. Rather, they bring their not inconsiderable talents to bear on whatever happens to be in the way at the time. The results can only be described as essential.
[Bloody Nonsense cover thumbnail]
One of the better Creation-era compilations. Canadian release.
[Unconditional cover thumbnail]
Western Family
For loonie completists only, for sure, though, if you listen through the muck, you'll see that we did our bit.
[Western Family cover thumbnail]
creation_records CD
Draining The Glass
Glass Records era compilation.
Purchase Now
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[Draining The Glass cover thumbnail]
Fire Records
The Wasted Years
Featuring ‘Bath Of Bacon’, ‘A Scandal In Bohemia’, ‘Sex And Travel’ and ‘Distressed Gentlefolk’.
Purchase Now
( )
[The Wasted Years cover thumbnail]
Fire Records 4xCD
Dr Cholmondley Repents: A​-​sides, B​-​Sides and Seasides
Four CD box set gathering A-sides, the would-be hits along with B-sides, tangential 12-inch tracks (the C-sides), and an excellent session for Los Angeles radio station KCRW from 1989.

Includes over a dozen indie chart hits including ‘Southern Mark Smith’, ‘Girl Go’, ‘The Human Jungle’, ‘16 Years’ plus a host of truly eclectic Butcher tunes from his early Glass recordings through his time at Creation.

Purchase Now
( )
[Dr Cholmondley Repents: A​-​sides, B​-​Sides and Seasides cover thumbnail]
Fire Records 4xCD

Pat Says

The Butcher Says..
Southern Mark Smith and Jazz Butcher -v- Count Dracula were recorded in the summer of 1983 in a place called Wellingborough, a small town in the middle of England where even the children are scarey! "Hey, mister, can you SEE in them glasses?" I get to sing and play things like guitar, sax and piano. Max does the electric guitar. On bass is Rolo McGinty, and Princess Alice Thompson plays the organ. They're both in the The Woodentops now, a group internationally recognised as being the shortest collection of pop musicians in the world. Playing the drums is Kevin Haskins, a charming neighbour of mine, and veteran of the Bauhaus conspiracy. Miaowula! Source: The Gift Of Music liner notes
Soft white underbelly = Saturday Scene. Source: A Scandal In Bohemia liner notes
Well, the JBC really did get a big return off this one. It opened a lot of doors for us in Europe and America, and listening back now I think I can see why. No, I mean that Hammond... Source: Unconditional liner notes
All right, here's the thing. The phrase came up some time in conversation and was duly seized upon. I think that it may well have been some kind of reference to Gerard Langley. We'd been to see the Aeroplanes quite early on in their career on account of a review in the NME written by our pal Campbell Stevenson, which went under the headline: "Exploding! Plastic! In Bristol???" But, you know, Mark E. Smith is so steroptypically northern that the very phrase "southern Mark Smith" comes across to me like "lush Sahara"or "wise and noble Bush". So there's that too.

The tune got "written" into a tape recorder during the BBC evening news broadcast on Easter Sunday 1983. References to Lady Di had already been excised by the time we recorded the single version, which was at the beginning of September 1983. Ah well."

Good. There's that one wrapped up in a tidy little package. Now if someone cares to explain "I Need Meat"...

A little later...

I saw a bit of correspondence on the site about this "Southern Mark Smith" business. Our dear friend Mister Berman appears to have had a fair stab at explaining what may or may not have been on my mind at the time (it is, frankly, not much use asking me at this advanced stage of the game...), but then another fellow (Hank, is it?) steps in with some rather more speculative stuff about one "McGinty".

Our pal is referring to "Pat, Trip Dispenser", which was the b-side to the Fall's single "C.R.E.E.P." Towards the end of the tune, things go quiet and Mister Smith is heard intoning (and I write from memory) "McGinty thought he could fool the Fall with his imitation speed!" (My memory is about 100% on this one, though.)

Now, "C.R.E.E.P." came out not long after we had recorded "Southern Mark Smith". Somebody at JBC Central (Mitch?) brought home a copy. We heard the b-side and were struck down with fear, for we ourselves were not sure whether somebody was having a pop at our gang (with Lolo Mcginty) or not. The man on the website clearly felt the same way, for he writes authoratitively for anyone who is paying attention that the McGinty hereinabove referred to was indeed the talented wee monkey boy who played bass for us.

You can see what is going on here - there is a "Pat" in the title, a "McGinty" in the lyric and it came out about the same time as our "Smith" record. You can see the way that Hank's mind is working here, can't you, Mister Holmes?

Trouble's not right. "Pat, Trip Dispenser" was already in the can before the Fall even heard our record. It is therefore definitely NOT an "answer record" to "Southern Mark Smith". And, as ever, the clue is in the title. Those who know the history of the Fall well will tell you that the song is in fact a blast at infamous Manchester dealer, Pat McGinty. (Oh yeah - Pat, Trip Dispenser!) There had been a bit of customer dissatisfaction on the band's part, and this was their way of getting back at the naughty pharmacist (no, don't start...)

So there you have it. Not the JBC, but some dodgy Mancunian c***. Hope that clears things up. Source: Pat Fish email 2003-02-24 08:45:31 (Monday, 24th of February 2003 - 20 years 219 days ago)

Live Stats

124 documented performances (click to explore)
1983 1 (JBC)
1984 4 (JBC)
1985 11 (JBC)
1986 9 (JBC)
1987 13 (JBC)
1988 8 (JBC)
1989 12
4 (Pat Solo)
8 (JBC)
1990 4 (JBC)
1992 16 (JBC)
1997 3 (JBC)
2001 3 (JBC)
2004 1 (Pat Solo)
2005 3
1 (Pat Solo)
2 (JBC)
2006 3
2 (Pat Solo)
1 (JBC)
2008 1 (Pat Solo)
2009 2 (JBC)
2010 2 (Pat Solo)
2011 2 (Pat Solo)
2012 6
4 (Pat Solo)
2 (JBC)
2013 7
2 (Pat Solo)
5 (JBC)
2015 3 (JBC)
2018 5 (JBC)
2019 3 (Pat Solo)
2020 1 (Pat Solo)
2021 1 (Tribute)


30 Second Teaser
8 Recorded Live Performances
2021-11-27 The Dublin Castle - London, England
Credit: Matthew Cockerill
2018-03-01 100 Club - London, England
Big Return
Credit: Joe Turner
2018-03-01 100 Club - London, England
Big Return
Credit: Matt Sewell
2013-12-12 The Musician - Leicester, England
Credit: Paul Cox
2013-06-17 The Cake Shop - New York, USA
Credit: John Leon
2013-06-13 The Labour Club - Northampton, England
Credit: andyskank64
2012-08-24 Private Party - , England
Credit: Philip Snow
2012-05-07 The Wheelbarrow - London, England
Credit: Charlie Pritchard
Visitor Feedback
Visitors' comments for this page [Add your own]
  • Big Return
    cedomil[at] - Cheda, Belgrade
    23Apr2020 3:24 PM (3 years 156 days ago)
    Don't you think it's high time we finally get lyrics to The Big Return version?
    It's literally nowhere to be found.
    Well, me and Max and Dave and Jones we think you ought to get out there and stop it! :)
  • Funny
    mikey_doyle[at] - Mike
    10Sep2010 2:32 PM (13 years 19 days ago)
    This is funny. You've not lived till Mark E Smith has slagged you.
  • But I want the original!
    cliftonr[at] - Clifton in Honolulu, Hawaii
    8May2006 9:34 PM (17 years 144 days ago)
    So does the original version (the one which appeared on the US v of Bloody Nonsense) appear on any album now in print?

    I just picked up a copy of Scandal in Bohemia and will be adding Draining the Glass, but it's just not the same as that first exultant version of SMS which was part of my first JB exposure. Along with 'The Devil is My Friend' - and I have the same question there, is that on anything currently in print and affordable? Vinyl copies of Bloody Nonsense are apparently selling for about $75 to the mad, desperate and/or lucky.
  • Uptempo version
    nicodelbosque[at] - Bozeman, USofA
    11Apr2005 12:28 PM (18 years 172 days ago)
    This is my all-time favorite Jazz Butcher song (with close competition from Nothing Special). This record rarely leaves my turntable at this time of year - still the perfect theme for a spring afternoon pub crawl after all these years. Thanks for the music, Pat!

    The original version is on the US compilation Bloody Nonsense - good luck finding it! I don't know why they put the "big return" version on the Draining the Glass compilation, which does have some great Glass Records era track on it (but no Jazz Butcher v. Prime Minister!). I still prefer to listen to the vinyl, but it's nice to have a backup!
  • brilliant!
    ideas[at] - tim
    1Apr2005 8:13 PM (18 years 181 days ago)
    ...but why can't I ever find the more "uptempo" version of
    "Southern Mark Smith"?

    I, like most of you, have really fond memories of those years
    listening to these songs...but for some reason, I can't find the

    Anyone know where to find it?

    Thanks Butchie for all the great times!
  • Dreaming of a Southern Mark Smith
    stromk[at] - Grand Rapids, MI, USofA
    27Aug2003 8:55 PM (20 years 34 days ago)
    In a short span of time, I have had several dreams about listening to Jazz Butcher records (always vinyl). In the first, I discovered, with great delight, that I had a box of Jazz Butcher cereal in a cupboard at my mother's house. I ate a bowl of it while I listened to Southern Mark Smith.

    In the second, I found a Jazz Butcher record including a cover of Sympathy for the Devil. It seemed like a good idea at the time.

    Next, I dreamt that I was listening to another Butcher record featuring a song all about Sticky Language Goo. I thought this was absolutely brilliant, and I jealously wished that I had written this song myself.

    Lastly, I was taking a psychology class in which the Butcher was the professor. I realized that I hadn't been very paying very close attention to the class, and that I would do very poorly on the final exam. The test asked us to describe the five stages of grief. I wrote something about denial, and then got up and left thinking that I didn't really need to be in this class anyway. After the test was over, I came back. I was relieved to find that he didn't seem to mind that I had blown off his class. He smiled at me flirtatiously.
  • Mark E. Smith again!
    marc[at] - Darmstadt, Germany
    27Jan2003 12:19 PM (20 years 247 days ago)
    Hi again,
    ok - after reading your comment on this song, i'm sure that it will fit perfectly into our project: A collection with worldwide songs about MES (for example Barbara Manning, Chris Cacavas, I, Ludicrous...) Hope to hear something from you!
    MES Superstar Project c/o marc[at] or